Shes Got A Butt Bigger Than The Beatles

Chords and lyrics for Shes Got A Butt Bigger Than The Beatles by Cledus T Judd

G 
She cooks wit
C 
 
lar
G 
d Loves ho
D 
t food bars
G 
A quart of s
C 
weet tea and
G 
fried 
 
po
D 
rk 
 
skins
G 
Can’t get enoug
C 
h eats ti
G 
ll she’s stuff
D 
ed
G 
Go’s to the bath room  
C 
and she com
D 
es back  
G 
again
 
She  
D 
thinks she looks just l
C 
ike 
 
Mado
G 
nna
 
When she  
C 
runs her  
G 
greasy fingers throug
D 
h her bleach blond hai
G 
r
D 
 
Most sometimes she’ll  
C 
place 
 
another
G 
order
 
And lordy have
C 
mercy 
 
on
G 
that little bitty
D 
chair
 
Sh
G 
e’s got a butt  
D 
bigger
C 
than the Beatl
G 
es
D 
Eatin me ou
C 
tta 
 
hou
G 
se and h
D 
ome
 
 
G 
Her booty size  
D 
well it  
C 
outta be illegal
D 
G 
She has  
D 
a hard time s
C 
ittin on the
D 
throne
G 
Hamburgers, 
 
H
D 
otdogs
C 
Cheese 
 
fries,
G 
and 
 
Coldslaw
G 
A dozen b
C 
ear 
 
c
D 
laws yum, yu
G 
m, 
 
yum
 
G 
Loves 
 
sau
C 
sage 
 
li
G 
nks, hates di
D 
et 
 
drinks
 
G 
Takes up both seats in  
C 
a two seater car
G 
D 
G 
Her doctor said, lay off  
C 
the 
 
bread
G 
D 
G 
But he didn’t say nothing bo
C 
ut a Snickers bar
G 
D 
D 
She drinks sweet m
C 
ilk by the gallon
G 
 
And shed neve
C 
r eat a salad or a Lea
G 
n Cuisine  
D 
G 
D 
 
And she’ll lay spread out on the hammock
C 
G 
 
After she’s don
C 
e her damage at Dairy
G 
Queen
D 
 
No you won
Em 
‘t find her name on the weigh
C 
t loss of fame
 
Down  
G 
at Jennie Crai
D 
gs
 
‘Cause when she ea
Em 
ts em’ out at th
C 
e Waffle House
 
T
G 
hey’ll bring in more ham a
D 
nd 
 
eggs

If Shania Was Mine

Chords and lyrics for If Shania Was Mine by Cledus T Judd

A 
If Shania was mine wouldn’t be proud of me
E 
Couldn’t hardly blame her cause I’m so derned ugly
A 
 
E 
If I got her on the Moonsh
A 
ine
A 
If Shania was mine say it fit just right
 
Though my polyester  
E 
suit was just a little too
A 
tight
 
E 
Cause I’d buy a new t
A 
upi
D 
Though I’d love to seduce h
A 
er
 
But she married  
D 
her 
 
producer
 
And all I do is  
E 
pray
 
If Shania was mine I think  
D 
I’d lose my mind
A 
 
 
E 
 
If she only teased me
A 
, squeezed me, pleased me one good time
 
And if she only knew, all the  
D 
things I’d Do
E 
 
I’d be the lawn mowin Crop growin, tatter
G 
pealing
D 
House cleaning kind
E 
A 
If Shania was mine
A 
Well if Shania was mine she’d have to better agree
E 
Can’t no one cook road kill better than me
A 
 
E 
She’d say, mmm, I like it like that
A 
 
A
D 
nd all I do is wonder who’s better boots are bent under
 
And know all I do is wine
E 
 
A 
If Shania, If Shania, If Shania, If Shania
 
If
E 
Shania was mine

How Do You Milk A Cow

Chords and lyrics for How Do You Milk A Cow by Cledus T Judd

 
But  
F 
I’ve got some kinfolk on the  
C 
Mason-Dixon 
 
line.
 
And  
F 
headed for my uncle’s  
C 
farm for a short time.
 
Dm 
I thought that
Em 
I would b
F 
e huntin’ an
G 
 
fishin’.
C 
I misunderstood him some
F 
how.
Dm 
So far there’s
Em 
nothin’ 
 
bu
F 
t chores here t
G 
 
mention.
C 
I didn’t mind feedin the  
F 
sows.
F 
But HOW DO YOU MILK A  
G 
COW?
 
How do you milk a  
C 
cow?
 
I wasn’t in  
F 
FFA.
 
This cow must think i’m  
G 
crazy
 
Up under it this
C 
way.
 
I’m sittin’ here a  
F 
pullin’, but there ain’t nothin’ comin’  
C 
out.
 
Oh E I E I  
G 
O,
 
How do you milk a  
C 
cow? 
 
 
C 
F 
 
F 
Can’t haul much hay in a  
C 
tiny sports car.
 
And  
F 
I’ve got shearin’ sheep right  
C 
down to an art.
 
Dm 
One thing’s for
Em 
sure,
 
I hate  
F 
shovelin’ 
 
ma
G 
nure,
C 
It gets all over my  
F 
overalls.
Dm 
Them horses need
Em 
shoein’
F 
I hear Bessie  
G 
mooin’.
 
So I  
C 
thought maybe I’d ask you  
F 
all.
F 
HOW DO YOU MILK A  
G 
COW?
 
How do you milk a  
C 
cow?
 
I think it’s safe to  
F 
say
 
A man could get ar
G 
rested for this stuff in  
C 
LA
 
This heifer must be  
F 
empty ’cause she ain’t puttin  
C 
out.
 
Oh E I E I  
G 
O,
 
Tell me how do you milk a  
C 
cow.
 
How do you milk a  
C 
cow?
 
I no longer  
F 
care.
 
I’m gettin sick and  
G 
tired of smellin’ dairy  
C 
air.
 
I’m headin’ back to  
F 
Cali
 
And I’m turnin’ in my  
C 
plow.
 
Oh E I E I  
G 
O.
 
How do you milk a  
C 
cow?
C 
F 

Every Light In The House Is Blown

Chords and lyrics for Every Light In The House Is Blown by Cledus T Judd

F 
I told you I d leave some flares on
C 
In case you ever wanted to find my home
A 
You frowned and said well the dang law should arrest ya
F 
C 
F 
Well this ole house keeps fallen apart
C 
So I went down to the local Wal-Mart
A 
And bought the Coleman lantern to impress ya
F 
C 
 
F 
Cause every light in the house is blown
C 
I keep on a clappin but they don’t clap on
A 
House looks like were the Amish live
F 
There’s really no point to pay the power bil
C 
l
F 
Every light in the house is blown
C 
The numbers won’t even light up on my telephon
A 
e
F 
Cause every light i
C 
n the house is blown
 
F 
It got awful dang depressin
C 
The lights all blew out one by one
A 
And I just can’t afford right now to replace them